May 26

Doing my homework this morning actually worked.  I woke up on time, read, slept for 20 minutes, then busted out a paper before getting ready for school, taking out the trash, and then going to class.  Unfortunately, I had to give a presentation in class today since I didn't go yesterday, but I think I did okay.  I wasn't prepared in the slightest, but I think it sounded like I knew what I was talking about.  We got out a little early, so I met with my group about our case study project and then I came home and crashed.  Hard.  Not as bad as Tuesday, but almost.
I was supposed to go out to dinner with Jesse, Maddie, and Yeltsin, but Maddie and Jesse forgot, so we called it off and are planning to try again next week.  I was pretty bummed since I was looking forward to getting out of the house.  I hate being here.  It's so lonely and sad.  I'm enjoying the time to sleep, definitely, but being awake is a bummer.  I'm glad that I don't have to be here alone much longer, but I also don't want to leave.  I haven't been gone from here for more than 2 days this whole year.  But it has to happen.  I don't know how this next month is going to turn out and I don't know how the 12 months after that will turn out either.  Everything just feels so up in the air.  Everything.  I want to know.
I tried watching a few movies after I read what I needed to for class, but none of them were grabbing my attention.  It was partly because they weren't very good and partly because my brain will not focus on anything.  It was getting me down today for the first time in a while.  I mean, I've been down lately, since that kind of seems to be my default setting unfortunately, but thought process wise, it hasn't resulted in me getting down on myself.  But tonight was different.  I can't even pinpoint exactly what caused it since I can't focus on ANYTHING, but there was something going on in my brain that made me sad.  But Scout's ready for bed, so I should probably be too.