June 11

We fell asleep right away, only Daniel woke me up at who knows when and then we didn’t fall back asleep until after 4.  Oh, that boy.  I don’t know what I’m going to do about that one.  Scout woke us up this morning by talking up a storm, but I think she was just confused about the boy in my bed and why she didn’t have room to cuddle.  I really do like cuddling.  If I could have Daniel around just for that, I would.  No, nevermind.  I’d need more than that.

It was weird to wake up with Daniel and then, just an hour and a half later, get picked up by Chris to go to lunch.  I really wish the weather was better, but it was okay.  All last summer I had to wear sweatshirts and it’s looking like this one is going to be the same.  Kind of a bummer.  But lunch with Chris went really well.  I think it was a date.  He picked me up and paid, so I think that’s what it means.  And we were flirty.  But it was really really fun and I had a really nice time.  We ended up walking around 3^rd street until we stopped into Barney’s Beanery for lunch, we walked around some more, got some candy at Candy Baron, and then he took me home.  I wanted to gush about it all day, but living with boys really isn’t the ideal situation to do that.  So I napped instead.  And watched a few movies.

And I did some more thinking today, mainly about how I’ve been feeling.  Either I finally have enough drugs built up in my system or all that self exploration did something because I actually feel okay for the first time in a long time.  And it’s not just the butterflies from lunch talking.  I genuinely feel better.  My dad asked me the other day about how everything was going.  He asked if what was going on made sense, I said yes.  He asked if I learned/will learn something, I said yes.  He asked if it will make me stronger in the long run, I said yes.  And then he asked me if I already felt stronger.  I told him that I thought so, but after further thought, I know so.  I already feel so much stronger after going through this most recent hardship.  I think I’m going to be okay.