I spent the rest of the afternoon surfing around online, "studying," and reading over some Motive stuff. Not super exciting, but it sufficed for my afternoon. I left the house around 4 to check my work schedule and to grab a bottle of Asti to celebrate being done with school. My final at 6 was done by 6:13 and then I came home for a quick sec.
I talked to my mom for a few minutes and intended on talking to Erin, still, but didn't. And then I got really mad at myself and started thinking about a million things and got overwhelmed and cried for like half an hour before going to the LAX dinner that I tried to plan. It failed. It was me, Elizabeth, and Frigo. Then like half an hour later, Jessie showed up, but didn't get anything. It was nice, but it wasn't what I had hoped for. After driving Frigo back to school, I headed over to the Stinkies to spend some time with Caroline and Rufus. We opened the Asti and watched some quality programming on E! until I left around 12:30.
Again, I was hoping to talk to Erin when I got home, but that didn't happen. After walking in to a brownie scented kitchen with an empty bottle of wine on the counter, I immediately knew my plan was foiled. Brittni was asleep on the couch and Katy and Erin were sitting there chatting. Katy took Brittni back to school and I went up to talk to Erin, but there was no point. She was drunk and tired. We're never going to talk. I don't even want to have that conversation. I just wanted to vent about how I've been feeling this week. I would vent to Katy, but I feel like the last time I wanted to, I failed and kind of got in trouble. I don't think I've earned venting time with Katy. Or Erin for that matter. So I'll just deal with it myself and self-implode like I always do. Real healthy. I'm great.
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